No, No Don’t Bite that Apple!

Damn, too late. Born a skeptic, I couldn’t resist eating from the Tree of Knowledge. The surest way to get me to do something is to tell me not to do it. Hey, it ain’t my fault. Guess God made me that way. Or something did.

Mom dragged me kicking and screaming into the Calvary Baptist Church at six, later dragged me kicking and screaming to high school and college at the Cavalry Church of Holy Warriors, aka New Mexico Military Institute. A good Christian soldier she meant me to be. It didn’t take. They didn’t even have any horses, and me having no equipment for sucking blood, felt my education was an unnatural act. I still feel that way at 66. Oh well, it gave me something very curious to think about, namely WTF?

My first few wasted Sunday mornings, when I could have been outside playing, I learned that most adults are superstitious ninnies. Either that or so malleable to peer pressure they’ll profess to believe nonsense rather than be cast from Eden. If that place was Eden, please let me out now! I’d sooner be with the sinners.

It’s against the law to run for public office in some states if you’re an atheist. It isn’t in Oregon but it may be after my campaign. I’m not really sure what an atheist is but think I probably qualify. I do have a profound reverence for the universe. I love people, think they’re pretty interesting critters. I like dogs too.

Confession, I hear, is good for the soul, whatever that is. Reminds me of that French prayer, “Dear God, if there is a God, please save my soul, if I have a soul.”

I do think it’s honorable to tell the truth. Well, most of the time. So here you have it, my truth. Swear to God.